Roses and Orchids
When I was young, I used to draw pictures of me surrounded by children, wearing a white coat and a stethoscope around my neck. I used to take care of the newly born puppies and identify their gender once they’re in my hands. I used to be the one doing all the dirty, bloody work of holding the chicken during our experiments.
When I was young, I dreamt of becoming a doctor. Looking back, I know I’ve always wanted this in spite of all the pain and suffering it carries along with it.
No, I wasn’t born with a silver platter on my hands. I am an average girl who goes out with friends at night and studies if I have any books to open. I rely on e-books and borrowed books from the library because I can’t afford the medical books that most of my classmates have in their bags. I can’t even afford to fail my subjects or my clerkship period because my parents could not support me for an extra year to repeat any subject. I am not poor but I went through tough times of having my greatest dream to become the biggest suffering of my family.
I will be a doctor even if we cannot afford med school, even if I’m not super smart and even if I do not have all the time in the world to study without having the guilt of the hundred thousand pesos that my parents are in debted with.
And I will be a doctor, even if I have to cry in front of my colleagues, seniors and patients, even if I was badly endorsed and even if some people wished I’ll never succeed. Because I know this is my CALLING. I felt that God had given me this gift to hold on to and I know I’m bound to make a difference in every one’s heart.
Yes, perhaps, it’s all about the “me, myself and I” kind of sharing but experience is my best teacher and even if I don’t have 100 happy days to share, I have a life story to inspire.
In my four years in med school, I was able to pass my subjects and maintain my grades for me to be a regular student. In second year, though I felt my first real heartbreak, I was recognized as a Dean’s Lister ranking as 3rd. I was also elected twice as secretary of the Student Body Organization in which I was part of the Medicine Night organizers. I was also elected twice as the Scribe of our confraternity and was given the chance to join the APMC Leadership Training for two consecutive years. I was the Powerpoint Queen and two of our researches - in Parasitology and Pharmacology - were commended well due to our good presentation. And last but not the least, I graduated as Bronze Medalist bringing home an honor to my parents.
And that, my friends, is only the beginning, because for as long as my dream burns like fire in my heart, I will continue to hold on to what God offered me to become.
I am born a doctor whether I like it or not. And I dreamt of it, not because my aunts and uncles were doctors too, or because it runs in our blood, but because I am born this way… A doctor in the making, who just seems average but was bound for bigger things by the grace of God.
I believe, therefore, I can.